Assertiveness & Self-confidence

Self-confidence grows through positive experiences. The more positive experiences, the better your self-esteem. If you are unlucky to be insufficiently supported in developing your assertiveness and self-confidence, this can haunt you for life. The thing is, not all of us are lucky enough to grow up with enough positive support. Fortunately, even in adulthood, you can develop yourself and learn to actually stand in your power.

At ZEON, you learn in a unique and safe way to restore your confidence in yourself and experience what it is like to really be yourself. With relatively little effort and in a relatively short time, you can develop into someone who believes in himself and radiates genuine self-confidence. You can learn to be assertive, so that you definitely start taking yourself seriously.

Learning to be positive about yourself

When you struggle to clearly stand up for yourself and communicate your views, it can seriously undermine confidence in yourself. It limits your options and you may slowly withdraw more and more into yourself. At the end of the day, life is about getting out what you care about and enjoying the things you do with enthusiasm. It is simple to learn how to start thinking more positively about yourself and thereby let go of old fears and frustrations.

When you can really say no, you also dare to give a truer yes.

'Yes, I can do this' or 'Yes, I'm going for it' are thoughts you like to have when facing a new challenge. These thoughts depend on the experience and support you have had in previous experiences. If you missed out on the support and positive experience, you will have to recover and make up for it later in life.

Fortunately, it is also quite possible to learn how to become more confident and assertive later in life. In fact, when you gain the insight into how to achieve this in yourself, it is not at all as difficult as is often thought.

People with a healthy dose of self-confidence and assertiveness feel better and more relaxed than those who lack them.

• Contacts: Contact with others is easier and with fewer problems. You radiate more clarity and can express yourself more forcefully. This makes it easier for others to understand what you like and don't like and what you need.

• Relaxation: Because you stand up for yourself better, you are naturally more relaxed. Tensions do not rise as high anyway, because you are clear about your limits. Others take you more into account and respect your opinions and comments.

• Opportunities: If you struggle to stand up for yourself and articulate your opinions unclearly, chances are you will not be noticed by others. You miss out on opportunities in your work and also on the relational front. You are afraid to address others and therefore you miss out on engaging conversations and interesting challenges.

• More stable: When you take responsibility for your own point of view and behaviour, you actively ensure that your living environment remains pleasant. You don't have to feel guilty or very insecure, nor do you need to push people away with aggression. You spontaneously stand up for your own interests and can respectfully consider other people's interests. As a result, you are and remain much more emotionally stable. You don't have to let emotions run very high or keep them to yourself very frenetically.

In training or therapy, we make you more aware of body language and posture. What do you radiate physically and what emotional message is hidden in it. You can read in books or on the internet how your posture should be, but without a conscious presence behind it, you will keep falling back into old patterns. It is necessary to see what makes your body language send out that message. When you start to see what is causing your attitude, you get the tools to consciously work on changing your appearance. That change then comes from within and will bring about a change that is lasting.

It is imperative that your body language comes from within and is not an attitude you have to constantly pay attention to or correct.

Body language is expressed by your posture, your gaze, the way you look, your voice volume and intonation, how you listen and interpret the words spoken and even smell can affect how you come across. You have no or limited influence on many of these things, especially in an exciting or emotional moment, you don't have time to pay attention to all of them. Body language should therefore also come from within.

It makes sense to consciously observe which attitude you want to change and also how you want to change that attitude. When you are only consciously aware that you want to change an attitude and have no tools to change, very little still happens. It is precisely having the idea of how you want to change that allows you to actually take a step in the right direction. Afterwards, you can evaluate for yourself whether the step you have taken is enough or whether you need to step it up a notch next time.

... express your opinion
... ask questions
... explain how you feel
... make your own decisions
... say no
... change your mind
... make mistakes
... set boundaries
... go back on a commitment you made earlier
... ask for an explanation of exactly what the other person means
... ignore suggestions from others

When you stand up for yourself, sometimes it is not the best for everyone. In the end, though, it is best for yourself and when you feel good you can be better for others.